PoopTeen has done it again!

“Look gentlemen at my Swimming Pool. This isn’t just any Swimming pool. This gentlemen is the ‘Doom Pool’. It is filled with specially bred Piranhas. We bred these Piranhas to survive in sulfuric acid. So as our oppressed and depressed people swim away their fears they are burnt and eaten. Hahahahahahahaha!!!! Moooouuuuuaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!”

“Wait a minute Kim!!! Your depressing oppression ends here!!! I’ll use my swift moves and intellect to save the swimmers. The Gang of Aces and I will give you and your men high kicks to the face.”

“I’ll get you PoopTeen!!! You may have stopped me from spreading my depressing oppression this time but my Evil Doer friend Stalin will not allow this to go unnoticed. You’re not going to get away next time PoopTeen!!! You will be forced to lay floral baskets at my feet.”

Never Kim!!! Never!!! The world is safe once more for babes to sleep soundly in their beds dreaming of figgy pudding and sugarplums. Thanks to PoopTeen.

Accolades for PoopTeen

The Fraternal Order of Beavers has bestowed it’s highest honor onto PoopTeen and The Gang of Aces for the image we posted of the noble beaver.  The gift bestowed to us is the Secret Silky Pelt and a certificate of it’s authenticity.

In case you are unaware of the Fraternal Order of Beavers they are the secret society behind the Canadian nickel.

PoopTeen All The Times

It’s happened kids.  PoopTeen is now cool.  For those of you that somehow doubted it’s coolness just find themselves slapped in the face once again.

“Oh, please tell me how did PoopTeen just get cooler??”
PoopTeen has joined the throngs on Twitter.  You can follow PoopTeen and The Gang of Aces at www.twitter.com/poopteen.  Plus you will now see a great little widget on the side that displays all the Twittery goodness.
PoopTeen will never use a ghost Tweeter but he can not speak for his minions or The Gang of Aces.

PoopTeen’s Pep-Talk for the stars: Jennifer Anniston

Dear Jen

It’s time someone stood up to say what has been on all our minds since we first saw you on ‘Friends’.
“It’s OK.  You’ll be fine.  You’re so much better than him.”
Here is some advice from The Gang of Aces.
1)  Yeah, you are getting older but you are still good looking.  Maybe even hot.  But way better looking than Brad(who is starting to look like Droopy the Dog).  So don’t waste your time with losers.  I don’t care if he says your body is a wonderland…More than likely these guys are Hollywood dorks caught up in themselves.
Which leads to…
2)  Date outside your circle.  Smell-A is filled with guys that shave their legs and prance around like ninnies.  Take a vacation talk with the cute bar tender.  They may surprise you.  They may even say “Wholly SHIT!!!  I’m dating Jennifer Anniston!!!” and treat you like a Goddess.
3)  Just do it.  Have fun.  Live a little.  It seems that whenever I’m standing in line at the grocery store you always have a glum look on your face.  A deep breath, a smile and stiff drink does wonders.
Finally.  Whatever you do.  DO NOT talk to Josef Stalin.  He may come across as a charmer but he is an Evil-Doer and will throw you away after he has had his way with you backstage at a Dave Matthews concert.
Now go get it Tiger…Or Tigress I should say.
If you need any further advice please contact PoopTeen.com